Define ???

I’m constantly Googling. I’m constantly searching for an answer to a random question or thought. I’ll shamelessly search for love, career, medical, friendship, cooking and practical advice. My search history paints such an accurate portrait of my weakness and inabilities that I have no other choice, but to continually ‘clear search history’. Luckily for me, Google doesn’t judge – well at least not to my face.

I’ve began to treat Google like some omnipotent source of knowledge. It doesn’t matter if the question is significantly important or completely pointless, if I’m unsure I’ll Google it. And if Google doesn’t contain the answers, then all hope is loss. Or I’ll keep rephrasing my question until I can find my desired answer.

Except, for some reason, Google doesn’t have a simple answer for ‘what do you do when you have to make a tough decision (and you really hate making decisions)?? The decision is time sensitive so you’ve got to act quickly but you better make sure you make the RIGHT decision and how do I seem like I know what I’m doing ?????’.

Google can define love, but it can’t make you feel it. Google has fifteen thousands suggestions on how to give a confident speech in front of a group of people, but it’ll never actually do the speech for you. Google will tell you that cooking an omelette is a rather simple task, but somehow cannot explain how you always seem to fuck it up.

Annoyingly Google doesn’t actually have all the answers. And no one else will be able to give you the answer. No matter how much you beg and please, or continually refresh the page. Google might give you a possible answers, but it’ll never truly enlighten you.

You must seek for the answer inside of you. (Lame, I know)

Now please enjoy a few of my past Google searches


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